Minnesota RollerGirls - Flat-track, skater-owned roller derby league in the Twin Cities of Minneapolis/St. Paul

On Saturday, diehard Minnesota RollerGirls fans and newcomers alike will rush the doors of the Legendary Roy Wilkins Auditorium to watch the next step in the evolution of derby in the Land of 10,000 Lakes.

Our first home bout rocked the derby world as the Rockits - reigning two-time champions - were laid low by the Atomic Bombshells. The Rockits must now win Saturday's bout - a repeat match of last year's season championship against the Garda Belts - to control their destiny. The Dagger Dolls are in a similar fix; their seven-point loss to the Gardas in January means that they must win against a transformed Bombshell team to have a strong chance to acquire the Golden Skate. We'll talk more on the win-loss situation in a moment, but let's look at Saturday's games.

The Atomic Bombshells (1-0) v the Dagger Dolls (0-1)

Fresh from their victorious confrontation against the Rockits, it is the Atomic Bombshells who have the advantage. As has been stated before, many of our Bombshells benefited greatly from summer conditioning playing with the All-Stars, and now the nimble orange stars must take on some of the fastest jammers and hardest hitters on eight wheels...the Dagger Dolls. The Dolls had a similar upswell of awesome from the summer season, but narrowly fell to the Gardas. Both January games were won or lost by less than ten points, a testament to how close the four teams are to one another in skill.

If you're new to the game or couldn't make it to the first home bout, I recommend you watch for the following:

- Both teams have jammers who can consistently break past the pack and hold control of the clock. In the last bout, Bombshell L'exi-Cuter went 10 for 10 on lead jams, Venus Thightrap went 3 for 4, Mae Gusta 3 for 5, and the Dagger Dolls' Psycho Novia went 6 for 7.
- Amidst the heavy point scoring of the Bombshells (a combined 73 points from the three just mentioned), it's easy to miss the efforts of Psycho. She doesn't often take chances, and her attention to the opposing jammer is without peer. If she's gotten the lead, she will shut down the jam the moment that her opponent is in contention to score, even if she's only gotten a couple of points. That sort of tight control assisted in keeping the Gardas to a score of fifty-nine. The Bombshells struggled a bit more with this in the last game, occasionally allowing the canny Rockits to sneak from behind and burst through, evening or besting the lead jammer's point differential.
- Sinaminn was greatly missed in the first bout; now freshly back from derby and vacation abroad, we'll see even more ferocity from the Dagger Doll front.
- If you're a stats wonk, it's hard not to notice the efforts of the Bombshells' second-year veteran jammer, L'exi-Cuter. In her ten lead jams, against the best that the Rockits' red walls had to offer, she scored slightly more than half of the Bombshells' points (43 of 78). In a forty-minute match, L'exi scored a rare offensive double-double; double-digit score and double-digit lead jams. L'exi doesn't just find space on the track...she establishes it and defends it as she speeds through the pack.
- The Dagger Doll defense didn't just do ok in the January bout; they were able to hold every jammer outside of Suzie Smashbox to five points or less. When you're dealing with vets like Rumblebee and Anita Spankston, that's pretty damn impressive. Watch for Sinaminn and Candi Pain to escort players to the outside of turns every chance they get, and Shiver Me Kimbers and Wonderbroad to send Bombshells tumbling through the inside to draw cutting penalties.
- Sparkle Ninja might argue this, but she had a remarkable game against the Garda Belts. While only jamming 3 for 7, she scored 28 of the Dolls' 50 points. She might have scored more; Sparkle got rocked by a bad decision to re-enter the pack after a penalty as a jammer before the pack had passed, sending her right back to the box in a key moment of the second half. Sparkle Ninja is a fast, ruthless threat as a jammer and a blocker; Bombshell fans, don't expect her to give your team the same opportunity.
- We at last get to see the rookie Bombshell Madame de Stompadour skate. Stompadour, last seen by the public during the Brawl of America winning a Queen of the Rink crown, has finally worked through an early-season injury. Best to her in her season debut, as well as to her teammate BOOMbay Safire, now out for the rest of the season after a freak injury in practice. BOOM...get well, dammit.
- Umm. Don't know how else to put this. Dagger Dude. Keytars rule.
- No jammer works alone, and it was clear that Bombshells were repeating to themselves, "I will take care of my jammer..." before the January bout for weeks. No team seems more concentrated on watching their jammers' back than the Bombshells. Whether Flora's front blocking, Skullateral Damage's presence of mind, or Diamond Rough's holding entire blocking lines inside, the Bombshells are shifting away from a strategy of sticking the opposing jammer and towards getting that lead jam and control of the clock.

The Garda Belts (1-0) v the Rockits (0-1)
The fifth season championship grudge match is days away, and the fans of the women in green must be counting the hours. The Gardas were soundly defeated by a dominant Rockit defense (92-31 in the championship), but it is a new year and both teams have evolved into something very unlike last year's rosters.

Let's get the discussion of Suzie Smashbox out of the way. Suzie put up fifty of the fifty-nine points that won the game against the Dagger Dolls. She puts on the star every other jam. No team in the league depends on a single jammer more than the Gardas. The Rockits have found ways in the past to shut that lightning-fast woman down, but it all comes down to keeping her from hitting that mind-searing top gear of hers. What's worse for those attempting to contain that speed, it appears that her blockers are investing a lot of time to get her through the denser packs of this season...not to repeatedly beat upon the baldly obvious, but any player wanting to hold back Suzie is going to have Tiki harassing her every single foot of the track.

And this bout, it looks like the jammer cavalry is arriving in force. MNRG cofounder (and damn fine jammer) Rolls Wilder will be lacing up against the Rockits, Angelfire is back from an injury sustained while playing a Mid-Iowan league, and will almost certainly be putting her speed to work. With Rumblebee, Cassie Rolle, and Anita Spankston in play as well, we may see a lot of sharing of that star...and that might be smart; the Rockit defense that held Suzie to under thirty points in the 2009 championship is largely intact.

Harmony Killerbruise? #2 overall scorer in the 2009 season? Still wearing Rockit red. Harmony, Abbie Mischief, and Scarmen Hellectra all scored double-digits in their losing bout against the Bombshells. Although Scarmen plays blocker for the All-Stars, we may see more of this woman at the jammer line come Saturday...although Scar's speed might be more useful in blocking Suzie and Rumblebee through the pack. There is also a sizable risk of Harmony pulling one-shot jamming tactics like her much-lauded negative pass on the Sioux Falls Rollerdollz in December. If Suzie is the speed queen of the MNRG, Harmony leads the league in strategic jamming. In a one-on-one situation - outside of the 20 foot engagement zone of the pack - Killerbruise is to be feared.

If I haven't gotten this across well enough, I think we're going to see a much more even match than last year. The Garda Belts have a remarkably deep blocking staff; Tiki Torture, Hanna Belle Lector, and co-captain Citizen Pain all have the skill and the endurance to play roller derby at the speed of the Rockits, and they will be joined in kind by Garda ne'er-do-wells Angelfire (the Gardas would be foolish to keep her as a pure jammer if she's got her stamina back) and Optimiss Crime. The Rockits are full of surprises, but January saw them still working out their sixth-season style. Stay tuned, folks. This one's going to be fun.

Now...to close, let's look at the win-loss situation. So...as it sits, if both the Bombshells and the Gardas win their respective game on Saturday, it will be Orange versus Green for the Golden Skate. (A Rockit fan out there just fainted, and we apologize to her family.) If either the Rockits or the Dagger Dolls lose again, that team will be out of the running to play for the championship.

If both win? Folks, if the Rockits and the Dollys win, the March bout may be the most exciting home game bout we've ever had...the winners of each game in March (Rockit/Dolls and ABS/Gardas) would play for the Golden Skate. Any of the four teams could move forward.

Oh, and one last thing. It is possible for a team to win two out of three games and still not advance if three teams do it. If teams end with the same win/loss record, the decision of who goes forward to the season championship is made on overall point-differential throughout the season. Got that? Good. Because it took me two hours and a protractor to get it all straight.

We will see you Saturday, folks. Tickets are selling fast...the fastest I've seen for ages. This season is shaping up to be the best yet. Don't miss a single hit.

Writing from where all the women are strong, all the men are accessories, and all the children turn left,

- Garrison Killer

Featured Event

This incredibly popular and fun event is back for a third year! The day will include over 2 hours of roller derby drills, games, and fun led by your favorite Minnesota RollerGirls. No previous skating experience required! Open to ages 4-20; guardian must be present and safety gear (helmet, wrist guards, knee & elbow pads) ...

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Featured Skater

Misfit Maiden

The story of this Atomic Bombshell starts with the exile of this beautiful maiden to the land of misfit toys. Here she stayed and learned from the misfit toys. She quickly became confident and stro...

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B2TV Streaming

Unable to attend the upcoming Minnesota RollerGirls events in person? You don't have to miss out on the action - all of this year's bouts will have high-quality live streaming courtesy of B2TV.

Events will be available for purchase ten minutes prior to the action beginning.

Live MNRG Derby

News

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Rockits triumph over Dolls, 129-37

At this point in the history of the Minnesota RollerGirls, no one expects a player to take a swipe at a rival. Fights are basically stories that old-timers tell the rookies about from the first couple of seasons. Still...there is rivalry in the MNRG, and no two teams have a more tempestuous one than the Dagger Dolls and the Rockits. The two teams have a different (if equally passionate) outlook on our sport; the Rockits tend to embrace the new, interleague road-warrior style of play, while the Dollys' core seems to rest in taking the classic big blocks with fast, fast jammers. In past years, these differences have manifested themselves in unusual ways. This year, the match was the thing, and the teams left it on the floor of the Roy.

Dolly jammer Psycho Novia broke out in the fir...

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Bombshells hold back Gardas 67-42

Saturday's match between the Atomic Bombshells and Garda Belts took an unexpected turn even before the first jam had begun. L'exi-cuter could not make the match due to outside obligations. As L'exi had provided half of the Bombshells' points over the past two jams, the Bombshells would have to up their defense and force principal jammers Mae Gusta and Venus Thightrap to further step up their own jamming. Meanwhile, the Gardas looked at this match as a last shot at the season championship. To be guaranteed a berth in the finals, they would have to defeat the Bombshells by forty-seven or more. Certainly a possibility, but Suzie Smashbox, Cassie Rolle, and Angelfire would need to keep charging through the Bombshell pack to make it happen.

Suzie Smashbox started strong for the Garda...

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MNRG Hometeam Bout 3 Preview

Before we start talking about these matches, a quick update from our ticket folks. Our non-Xcel/Roy/Ticketmaster outlets sold out as of Monday, but there are still plenty of tickets. However, if you know that you're coming a little later for this bout, why not pick them up this week at the Roy Box Office (open 10-6pm) or through Ticketmaster?

If you have tickets already, come early and get in line. While it's great that there are no bad seats in Minnesota's own House of Derby, the bout is going to be packed and that usual seat that you love might not be available if you don't show up a bit ahead of time.

Also, we are very pleased to announce a change in next year's schedule. We will be flipping the calendar so that the home teams will begin in October and the season championship ...

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MNRG Finals outlook 2010: by the numbers

Two bouts remain in the Minnesota RollerGirls season. The results from March's bout will determine who will compete to raise the coveted Golden Skate (currently held by back-to-back winners, the Rockits) and who will play for third. Right now, no team has confirmed their berth in the season championships...though two teams definitely have the edge right now.

For those unaware, the MNRG send the top two teams forward to the finals. In the case of a tie in W-L, the team with the top overall point differential (points scored on opponents - points allowed) gets the spot. Looking only at the numbers - the win-loss record and the points, not the personalities or the relative strengths of the teams - this is what your MNRG home teams must do to secure a spot at the jammer line for April...

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Rockits take Gardas 118-35

Sweet mercy, we sold out! Thank you to all of the fans who joined us for Saturday's bout; we scanned 4723 tickets...but considering all of the children that come to our bouts that go unticketed, Roy staff, and MNRG volunteers, it's very likely that the Legendary Roy Wilkins Auditorium played host to 5,000 women, men, and children!

The extent to which this matchup was anticipated could not be underestimated. With the Gardas a game ahead of the Rockits at the start of the bout, the Gardas had an opportunity to shut the Rockits out of the season championship for the first time since the women in red rose from the ashes of the first season's Silver Bullets. Couple that with their sixty-point defeat at the hands of the Rockits in the last season championship, and you really have all of...

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Atomic Bombshells defeat Dagger Dolls, 63-38

Sweet mercy, we sold out! Thank you to all of the fans who joined us for Saturday's bout; we scanned 4723 tickets...but considering all of the children that come to our bouts that go unticketed, Roy staff, and MNRG volunteers, it's very likely that the Legendary Roy Wilkins Auditorium played host to 5,000 women, men, and children!

The Atomic Bombshells entered this match with a 1-0 record; having narrowly defeated the Rockits in January, the Bombshells were looking for another win to firm up their championship berth in April. The Dolls were a game behind after a nine-point defeat by the Garda Belts and needed this win to reasonably seek the berth. With a three-game season before the finals, every point in every game counted...particularly in a season as close as this one.

The D...

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Saturday night turnout

We'd like to thank our fans for the HUGE turnout on Saturday night. We've never had to turn people away at the door before and that's both an exciting and sad moment for us. Exciting because we're happy and honored so many wanted to come out. Sad because we'd never want to have to turn people away. We hope that if you didn't make it in on Saturday, you'll come back March 6 for our next bout.

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Season 6, Bout 2 preview

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Garda Belts beat back Dolly assault, 59-50

Last year's bottom-ranked Dagger Dolls took on the Garda Belts, (2009 runners-up), for this first bout of the new home season. There was expectation that this would be a high-scoring game as a bevy of Dolly speedsters took on Suzie Smashbox. It really was anything but that. Although the teams had less than five practices before this bout as the Dolls and as the Gardas, the close scores and the heavy reliance on delaying the jammer instead of knocking her out denoted a bout fought between two strong packs instead of a battle of star-wearing skaters.

After months of playing with one another on the MNRG All-Stars, Dolly #109 (Psycho Novia) skated next to her opponent Suzie Smashbox and took her stance at the jammer line. The jammers threw themselves forward, but Suzie boxed up Psycho's ...

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Set to maximum yield, Bombshells break Rockit streak, 78-76

For many fans of the Minnesota RollerGirls, the Rockits have always been the winners. They just win; they're the serious, hard-working, take-care-of-your-body kind of players that can tell you the ins and outs of the game as they outdrink you. If you started attending bouts in Season 4, you've never known anything different. On Saturday, the Rockits lost. More importantly, the Atomic Bombshells - under the leadership of Mitzi Massacre and Misfit Maiden - played a smart game and beat the back-to-back champions of the Minnesota RollerGirls in a match that brought the fans roaring to their feet.

Venus Thightrap - lately the prime pivot for the All-Stars - returned to her jammer roots for the Atomic Bombshells against Harmony Killerbruise for the first jam. As the jammers made their way ...

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